reblogged from february because I am still being asked:
While I travel between two very different worlds, one might just as well say, universes, between the paper world of the lawyer backed up by the many stories and needs of my clients, as different from one another as one can imagine, and the turpentine world of art, the stark smells, the mess, the need to tangle that which has just before been neatly ordered, backed up only by my own perception of the beauty of randomness, my need to stretch beyond the confines of an individual biography and yet of course always landing face first back in, well if not in the mud then at least in a bucket of paint like any other clown in business,
while I travel between these worlds I feel entirely grateful that for some random reason I have been given the gift of intense pleasure in all these fragments that might never amount to much, not make a front page but at any time give me a sense of wonder and awe of the wild twists and turns. How I wish you would, too, I mean, take intense pleasure in what is, not fear how much or how little there is to come. Take the deep breath and dare to live this imperfect, strange, angst-ridden, beautiful, funny, short, long, light, dark thing called a life. How I wish you’d get to be just you, not judge yourself nor let yourself be judged by others while you lay down, if only for a moment, the burden of your insight.
Here’s to the wild twists and turns, my friend, to moments of desperation followed by sudden outburst of unfounded optimism, to the great calm between the days of discontent and the fractured mirror of contentedness reflecting the light of other possible worlds.